Christmas Carols for the Psychiatrically Challenged
Schizophrenia —
Do You Hear What I Hear?
Multiple Personality Disorder —
We Three Queens Disoriented Are
Amnesia —
I Don’t Know if I’ll be Home for Christmas
Narcissistic —
Hark the Herald Angels Sing About Me
Manic —
Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Streets and Stores
and Office and Town and Cars and Buses and Trucks and Trees and Fire
Hydrants and
Paranoid —
Santa Claus is Coming to Get Me
Borderline Personality Disorder —
Thoughts of Roasting on an Open Fire
Personality Disorder —
You Better Watch Out, I’m Gonna Cry, I’m Gonna Pout,
Maybe I’ll tell You Why
Obsessive Compulsive Disorder —
Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells,
Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells,
Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells
Agoraphobia —
I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day But Wouldn’t Leave My House
Autistic —
Jingle Bell Rock and Rock and Rock and Rock …
Senile Dementia —
Walking in a Winter Wonderland Miles From My House In My
Slippers and Robe
Oppositional Defiant Disorder —
I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus So I Burned Down the House
Social Anxiety Disorder —
Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas While I Sit Here and Hyperventilate 
