Daily Giggles

The present King George in his younger days visited Canada in company with the Duke of Clarence. One night at a ball in Quebec, given in honor of the two royalties, the younger Prince devoted his time exclusively to the young ladies, paying little or no attention to the elderly ones and chaperons. His brother reprimanded him, pointing out to him his social position and his duty as well. “That’s all right,” said the young Prince. “There are two of us. You go and sing God save your Grandmother, while I dance with the girls.”  Read more»

Two gay men decide to have a baby. They mix their sperm together and have a surrogate mother artificially inseminated with it.When the baby is born, they rush to the hospital. A dozen babies are in the ward, eleven of whom are crying and screaming.Over in the corner, one baby is smiling serenely. A nurse comes by, and to the delight of the gay fathers, she points out the happy child as theirs.’Isn’t it wonderful?’ one gay says to the other. ‘All these unhappy babies .. and yet our baby is so happy. This just proves the Superiority of gay love!’The nurse says, ‘Oh sure, he’s happy now but just watch what happens when we pull the thermometer out of his... Read more»

Q: What are the three occasions on which an Italian man visits his priest? A: His first communion. When he gets married. Before his electrocution.  Read more»

Big Boss: This year your performance was good, excellent and outstanding. So, your rating is “average”. Kumar: What? How come ‘average’? Big Boss: Because…err. ..uhh…you lack domain knowledge. Kumar: But last year you said I am a domain expert and you put me in this project as a domain consultant. Big Boss: Oh is it? Well, in that case, I think your domain knowledge has eroded this year. Kumar: What??? Big Boss: Yes, I didn’t see you sharing knowledge on Purchasing domain. Kumar: Why would I? Because I am not in Purchasing, I am in Manufacturing. Big Boss: This is what I don’t like about you. You give excuse for everything. Kumar: Huh? *Confused* Big... Read more»

Two priests are off to the showers late one night. They undress and step into the showers before they realize there is no soap.Father John says he has soap in his room and goes to get it , not bothering to dress. He grabs two bars of soap, one in each hand, and heads back to the showers. He is halfway down the hall when he sees three nuns heading his way. Having no place to hide , he stands against the wall and freezes like he’s a statue. The nuns stop and comment on how life-like he looks. The first nun suddenly reaches out and pulls on his manhood. Startled , he drops a bar of soap. “Oh look” says the first nun , “it’s a soap dispenser”. To test her theory... Read more»

An English parachutist and an Irish parachutist were arguing about who was best at folding a parachute. Unable to resolve their dispute on the ground, they decided to go up in a plane and judge by the mid-air performance of their parachutes. The Irishman jumped first, pulled his cord, and started floating down towards the earth. Then the Englishman jumped, pulled his cord and nothing happened; he pulled his safety cord – nothing. In a matter of seconds he whizzed past the Irishman, plummeting like a stone. “Oh,” shouted the Irishman, yanking off his harness, “so ya wanna race, do ya?!”  Read more»

Cooking my own meals would be an adventure, not a punishment.I wouldn’t have to explain why I’m wearing “that” shirt with “those” pants.I could leave the toilet seat in any position I damn well please.I could actually tell the bartender, “If anyone calls, I’m here”.I’d be painting the town instead of the house.When I get home after work, I don’t have to start work again.I could show my girlfriend where I live.I’d be driving a miniskirt instead of a minivan.The only weeds I’d be concerned with are the ones I’m rolling.I would have saved $372,416.21 in groceries by now.I wouldn’t catch so much grief about... Read more»

“I think,” said the heir apparent, “that I will add music and dancing to my accomplishments.” “Aren’t they rather light?” “They may seem so to you, but they will be very handy if a revolution occurs and I have to go into vaudeville.”  Read more»

Mr.Sharma comes home one night, and his wife throws her arms around his neck: “I have great news: I’m a month overdue. I think we’re going to have a baby! The doctor gave me a test today, but until we find out for sure, we can’t tell anybody. “The next day, Mrs.Sharma receives a telephone call from AEC (Ahmadabad Electric Company) because the electricity bill has not been paid. “Am I speaking to Mrs.Sharma ? “”Yes…… speaking”AEC guy, “You’re a month overdue, you know!” “How do YOU know?” stammers the young woman. “Well, ma’am, it’s in our files!” says the AEC guy. “What... Read more»