A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the mechanic it died. After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly.She says, “What’s the story?”He replies, “Just crap in the carburetor”She asks, “How often do I have to do that?” Read more»
6 Feb
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A blonde named Barbara appeared on Who Wants to be a Millionaire. … Regis: “Barbara, you’ve done very well so far, $500,000 and one lifeline left–phone a friend. The next question will give you the first ever million dollars if you get it right…. but if you get it wrong you will drop back to $32,000…are you ready?” Barbara: “Sure I’ll have a go.” Regis: “Which of the following birds does not build its own nest? Is it…A-Robin, B-Sparrow, C-Cuckoo or D-Thrush Remember, Barbara, it’s worth 1 million dollars.” Barbara: “Oh, gees, that’s simple…. it’s a cuckoo..” Regis: “You’re... Read more»
9 Dec
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During a rock climbing expedition, an accident occurred, as some of the grappling hooks gave way. This left the eleven climbers clinging precariously to the wildly swinging rope suspended from a crumbling outcropping on the Mountain. Ten were blonde, one was a brunette. As a group they decided that one of the party should let go. If that didn’t happen the weight on the rope would cause more of the hooks to give way and everyone would perish. For an agonizing few moments no one volunteered. Finally the brunette gave a truly touching speech saying she would sacrifice herself to save the lives of the others. All ten blondes applauded. Read more»
9 Dec
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Three blondes are stuck on a desert island and one finds a magic lamp. They rub it and a genie pops out and gives them each a wish. the first blonde says, “I wish I was 10% smarter so I could get off of this island.” Then she turns into a redhead and swims off the island. The second sees what happens and says “I wish I was 25% smarter so that I can get off this island!” She then turns into a brunette, makes a raft from trees and sails off. Finally, the third blonde says “I wish I was 50% smarter so I can get off this island.” She then suddenly turns into a man and walks across the bridge. Read more»
22 Aug
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A business man got on an elevator. When he entered, there was a blonde already inside who greeted him with a bright, “T-G-I-F.” He smiled at her and replied, “S-H-I-T.” She looked puzzled and repeated, “T-G-I-F,” more slowly. He again answered, “S-H-I-T.” The blonde was trying to keep it friendly, so she smiled her biggest smile, and said as sweetly as possibly, “T-G-I-F.” The man smiled back to her and once again, “S-H-I-T.” The exasperated blonde finally decided to explain. ‘T-G-I-F’ means ‘Thank Goodness It’s Friday.’ Get it, duuhhh?” The man answered, “‘S-H-I-T’ means ‘Sorry, Honey, It’s Thursday.’” Read more»
27 Jul
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Bob, a 70-year-old, extremely wealthy widower, shows up at the Country Club with a breathtakingly beautiful and very sexy 25 year- old blonde who knocks everyone’s socks off with her youthful sex appeal and charm. She hangs onto Bob’s arm and listens intently to his every word. His buddies at the club are all aghast. At the very first chance, they corner him and ask, “Bob, how did you get the trophy girlfriend?“ Bob replies, “Girlfriend? She’s my wife!” They’re amazed, but continue to ask. “So, how did you persuade her to marry you?” “I lied about my age“, Bob replies. “What, did you tell her you were only 50?” Bob... Read more»