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June 13, 2011

Funny jokes-Ways to spend the $250 million powerball jackpot

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Some Ways To Spend The $250 Million Powerball Jackpot

– A twinkie for everyone in the country.

– Develop and market an action-figure doll of yourself.

– Get yourself one a’ them “Pentagon quality” toilet bowls.

– Pay for a top-notch therapist to deal with the feeling that, compared to Bill Gates, you’re still not rich.

– At long last: a home-slurpee machine of your VERY OWN!

– Four words: Prank call to Antarctica.

– Goodbye aluminum siding: Hello golden siding.

– Get it all in pennies and ride the horse in front of K-mart, FOREVER!

April 20, 2010

Joke of the day – GOSSIP

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The seven-year-old daughter of a prominent suburban resident is, the neighbors say, a precocious youngster; at all events, she knows the ways of the world.

Her mother had occasion to punish her one day last week for a particularly mischievous prank, and after she had talked it over very solemnly sent the little girl up to her room.

An hour later the mother went upstairs. The child was sitting complacently on the window seat, looking out at the other children.

“Well, little girl,” the mother began, “did you tell God all about how naughty you’d been?”

The youngster shook her head, emphatically. “Guess I didn’t,” she gurgled; “why, it’d be all over heaven in no time.”

April 15, 2010

Prankster pays for stealing a police hat

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One good turn usually deserves another, but one prankster decided to steal two policemen’s hats while they were doing him a favour. Police officers had offered Angus Budge, 20, labourer of Napier and a friend a lift home when he pulled off the funny pranks of stealing the police hats.

He was intoxicated and standing with a friend on the corner of Carlyle St and Thackeray St in Napier when police offered them a lift home on September 3 at 3am. They were taken to an address in Edmundson St and as he was getting out of the police car, Budge took the hats.

He appeared in the Napier District Court yesterday, he pleaded guilty to stealing the hats, that valued at $78.17. He told police he did not know why he did it. Defense lawyer Alan Cressey said Budge wanted to sincerely apologize for his actions which were committed after police did him a huge favour.

Judge Bridget Mackintosh said Budge accepted it was drunken, stupid stuff behavior and was suitably embarrassing’. She convicted him on one count of theft and remitted $5250 of fines, built up by driving on a learner licence, for 70 hours’ community work. A decision on Budge’s remaining $3440 fines will be made on November 11.

April 3, 2010

Brad Pitt and Matt Damon Prank George Clooney

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On The Late Show with David Letterman last night, Matt Damon appeared and it was a pretty hilarious interview. They start off by discussing the rumors that Matt Damon is dead. Obviously, he is alive and well, but the exchange between Damon and Letterman is pretty funny. And, on to the hilarious jokes!

Brad Pitt was out promoting Inglorious Basterds and was getting fed up with questions on whether he and Angelina Jolie were going to get married and ended up joking that he and Angie will not getting married until “George and his partner can legally do so.”. The overseas journalist had no idea this it was clearly a joke.

Matt starts telling the story that he was at the Venice Film when the Italian journalist comes in and goes, Matt, is it true what Brad say? And I have no idea what he is talking about. But you know, I go, ‘Yeah, of course it’s true.’ And he says, ‘Do you mean George Clooney have a boyfriend?’ And now I’m trying to keep a straight face and I go, ‘Yeah, of course he’s got a boyfriend. ‘And he wants to legally marry him?’ We’ve been on him about this for years…”

Matt calls it a “harmless little joke” and we agree with Dave when he said that he is sure Clooney is still laughing about that one. Pitt, Clooney and Damon are known to be good friends who often joke and play pranks on each other. Now, we have to wonder if George Clooney is behind the Damon death rumors, or if he has something else up his sleeve.

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January 1, 2010

Forest Park s Nate Brown stands out

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Nate Brown, unlike many of his teammates, has been with the varsity club of Forest Park football team for the last four years. It’s not just his tenure that sets him apart, but his temperament on the field and in the huddle.

Between funny pranks and hilarious jokes pulled on teammates, he led the Bruins with 81.5 tackles in 2008, including 19 that resulted in negative yardage for the opposition. Brown has made a name for himself on the defensive side of the ball as an all-district linebacker.

The rest of the guys look up to him since he’s the heart of the defense and understands what they’re doing scheme-wise. Being part of the development of their school program helped him know what to expect and tries to help the young guys on the squad prepare.

Brown has been doing some preparing of his own this preseason, learning a new position as running back or half back in addition to his customary role at linebacker. Coach Chandler of Forest Park football team, knowing Brown has the best hands on the team, wanted to get more use out of his athletic tackle-machine and decided to try him as a running back this year. Brown always wanted to be on the offensive side of the play where he’s the one going to take the hit and not other way around which he is well known for.

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December 9, 2009

Adult jokes-Prankster

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Bill had always been a prankster. As each of his friends were married, Bill made sure some type of practical joke was played upon them. Now ready to be married himself, he was dreading the payback he knew was coming.
Surprisingly, the ceremony went off without a hitch. No one stood up during the pause to offer a reason ‘why this couple should not be married’. His reception wasn’t disrupted by streakers or strippers, and the car the couple was to take on their honeymoon was in perfect working order.
When the couple arrived at their hotel and entered the room, Bill even checked for cornflakes in the bed (a gag he had always loved). Nothing, it seemed, was amiss. Satisfied that he had come away unscathed, the couple fell into bed and put their attention to consummating the union.
Upon waking after such an active night, the couple was ravenous so Bill called down to room service and asked ‘Can I get breakfast for two?’. Before he was able to hang up, however, a soft voice from under the bed said ‘Make that five…’

October 30, 2009

Prankster Ribery wants more fun at Bayern

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The Frenchman Franck Ribery, a winger for the Bayern Munich, wants to bring the fun and games back to training after several months of rigorous, regimented work under Louis van Gaal. He has a reputation for being a joker in the dressing room and regularly performed hilarious jokes on his team-mates and even former coaches Ottmar Hitzfeld and Jurgen Klinsmann during his first two years with the club.

Ribery may be planning to lighten up his coach, although he admits that the more serious approach to training is also working. However, since Ribery does not believe Van Gaal would see the funny side to any shocking pranks ideas, he has so far kept his head down and followed orders.

Ribery could be fit to make his first start of the season this weekend after recovering from a calf strain picked up while on international duty for France. He was able to train fully on Tuesday and could appear for France in their crucial World Cup qualifier against Serbia tonight, giving him more match fitness to enable Van Gaal to pick him with Arjen Robben in his first-choice team on Saturday.

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October 27, 2009

Jet’s Sanchez psyched to face former USC roommate

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The Jets’ starting quarterback rookie Mark Sanchez, the fifth overall pick of this year’s NFL draft, is very excited and can’t wait for the 2009 NFL season to officially begin. He is about to get a true educational experience since the defensive schemes and the speed of the game would ramped up more than just a notch compared to the preseason games on Sunday when they face the Houston Texans in Texas.

Sanchez first NFL game would give him captivating flashbacks, facing a fellow rookie and former USC college teammate, Brian Cushing, the Texans’ strong side linebacker. Both rookies were roommates for about 21/2 years at Southern California. They grew pretty close and had their share of college yucks, pulling the kind of shocking pranks that stay in the memory banks forever.

According to Sanchez, Brian Cushing always had something going on in the house or something funny to say about practice or class. He used to have a snake in their apartment and when people would come over and fall asleep at their house. They would put the snake on their guests to see how scared they got which they taught was a pretty funny pranks idea.

At USC, Sanchez and Cushing saw players constantly come and go, and they were two of the mainstays, considered the vocal leaders of the offense and defense. When players needed a pep talk, they didn’t mind firing their teammates up. Although the two have had hundreds of laughs together, there won’t be anything comical if Cushing comes flying around the end and plants Sanchez on his backside. If that does happen, it’s a sure bet that Cushing will do a little trash talking.

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September 24, 2009

Forest Park’s Nate Brown stands out

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September 23, 2009

Daniel Radcliffe claims he is done partying and pulling pranks

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The 20-year-old star Daniel Radcliffe claims he is too old for partying. In the past he used to play a lot of stupid stuff pranks and get involved with drinking or partying with the cast. Now, he no longer socializes with the rest of the ‘Harry Potter’ cast and crew because he wants to carve out a career as a respected, matured and serious actor.

He also blasted stars who are only interested in fame, insisting he hates the celebrity culture where people are celebrities as a by-product of what they do. He couldn’t care less about people reading every little thing about Peter Andre and Jordan. He said they don’t want to work, have no interests, no passions, nothing and yet they seem to be held up on pedestals. It does annoy him but can’t do anything about it since his part of it.

Daniel’s serious attitude appears to be in contrast to his ‘Harry Potter’ co-star Rupert Grint. Rupert has been spotted at several UK music festivals this summer and makes no secret of his love of wild nights out. He recently said that when he’s drunk, he likes to cause mischief. He steal props like the broomsticks from the ‘Harry Potter’ set and bring them out to the pub for comedy value. It seems funny at the time, trouble is he usually gets too trashed to remember what happened the next day.

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